haha!lucy's probably gonna hate this photo opening this post - but it's cute as.
Fuck you Kent!!! I would like to note that this is KENT's late night souvlaki, that he shoved in my hand before running off, thus my 'Eh?!' expression. What the hell is happening with my lips? Yikes.
the art productivity continues apace.we were playing around with some giant birds, testing out some options,
and have a vague idea to produce a series of large paste-ups of long legged, birds of spring.
above, lucy's testing out some pattern options.
the bird on the left is more like the direction we'll probably take, with long spindly legs about 1.5m.
yesterday was a pretty long day actually, we headed out, firstly, to the nature museum.
billed as the 5th largest nature museum in the world, we super excited and all prepared to be wowed and enthralled at the vast array of the collection.
sadly, we were underwhelmed.
it was a good collection, no worries there, but not that big. i think adelaide has a reasonably similar-sized collection. it was worth a look still, and we got to see some huge dinosaur skeletons, about 43 000 small samples of crystals and, terrifyingly, a room devoted to the 'art' of musuem-quality taxidermy.
that was horrific. you could imagine the details, no need to elucidate them here.
this, however, was equal parts hilarious to the horror.an early example of taxidermy. so atrociously and poorly executed it makes you laugh.
until you realise a beautiful little wild animal was hunted down in africa so that some douche bag in a white coat and pipe could practice getting his anatomical construction skills together.
yes, taxidermied baby birds stuffed into taxidermied mummy bird.seriously, the wonder was lost when we went to the bird section and and and there was a duck and a ... quail (? maybe?) with a whole loot of little cute as taxidermied ducklings and quail-ettes and we were all like "woooooah sooooo cuuuuuuute" but then like "oooooh nooooooooo!! who kidnaps ducklings only to kill and stuff them?!" WHYYYYYYY?!?!!?
and...
oh.
my.
god.
this monkey - argh! ! ! !
it may be hard to make it out properly here, but this face was mounted on a mirror.
it has its right eye left empty which means you could look at it,
line up your own eye and... bang... you were the monkey.
i tried to capture here as best i could with the camera angle and stuff, but if you click on the image to make it bigger, you should see my eye there. in situ, it was fully in place.
i cannot articulate how provoking this effect was.
it.
freaked.
the fuck.
out of me.
seriously, it nearly made me cry. even thinking about it now.
of course, my natural inclination now is to make this into an artwork.
my.
god.
this monkey - argh! ! ! !
it may be hard to make it out properly here, but this face was mounted on a mirror.it has its right eye left empty which means you could look at it,
line up your own eye and... bang... you were the monkey.
i tried to capture here as best i could with the camera angle and stuff, but if you click on the image to make it bigger, you should see my eye there. in situ, it was fully in place.
i cannot articulate how provoking this effect was.
it.
freaked.
the fuck.
out of me.
seriously, it nearly made me cry. even thinking about it now.
of course, my natural inclination now is to make this into an artwork.
anyway, i don't wanna give the impression that the joint was a misery guts of a place.
it was good.
as far as these things go.
there was this one amazing climate-controlled room with flasks of fish.
it looked more amazing as a space than anything else.
Department of mysteries anyone?
Woah! This is a fish in a jar - fucking freaky shit, no? I kept hearing "Luuuucy, why did you let me diiiiie?"
"I thought we were friiieeeeends" BAAAARGH!
after that, we nicked off to the contemporary art show down the road.
(ps - 'nicked off'...? being in a foreign language culture really messes up your own natural lingo.)
(pps - see! 'lingo'?!)
lots and lots of art.
LOTS.
i'm gonna try and write a review about some of the stuff we saw and see if i can get it published.
if i can i'll post it up here.
so i won't ramble on about that now. (Cuz it was pretty boring - though to be fair, awesome fucking collection. But made less awesome by security guards following you into every corner - look dude, I ain't gonna steel a 10 metre Andy Warhol. I just wanted to have a LOOK. Gah.)
and then...
we saw a collection of short films about animals (twas an animal themed day apparently)
in a little place we almost couldn't find.
It was quite weird.
For the record, our fabulous hanky-map of Berlin did an epic not-so-fabulous-after-all fail. The gallery was NOT where the map said it was.
But we found it, with some super-bold doorbell ringing on my part.
where they practically apologised for charging us €1 for a beer.
What we thought would be an epically cool vibey film viewing ended up being Kent, myself and three very nervous Brits, being shut in a dark room of quiet viewing.
lucy learnt about seahorse males carrying the bebbies in a pouch,
and that video art, for the most part, bores her into a stupor.
Oh no, I already knew that. It wasn't even video art really. Donkeys pissing on the floor is NOT THAT INTERESTING. I don't give a shit how good your lens is. I just thought it would be a little more fun drinking beer and glancing and a little less sitting in a lecture theatre and not speaking. It was like being at school!
sometimes, it truly is gruelling.
and then we were off to drinks and magicians and 7ft german men at the bar (i stood next to this dude, and i didn't even reach his shoulder. i actually felt my ego shrivel. and yes - i said my ego...) and strange little german men fawning over our norwegian drinking partner and discussions about paper wrapped inside souvlakis in melbourne.
we finally acclimatised to the berlin hours and actually stayed up until 230am!
'twas a fun evening at a local bar called wohnzimmer with renee and stefano.
i kept getting the surly pregnant bar chick, who just glowered at me whenever i said anything in deutsch,
and lucy got the friendly (and sexy) spanish bar dude, who seemed well flirty.
quoteth my wife, 'i could so have picked up if i wanted'.
nice. (It's true - he was into me.)
and we had an old drunk english magician come and play tricks at our table
...and gyrate his creaky old hips in renee's face. (He was seriously into Renee, kept saying "tricks for the lay-deees!" while humping near her head.)
his tricks were ok
(they were quite good, except he kept doing maths related tricks,
which were lost on me, and then cracking up and saying "oh no I made a mistake ho ho ho!")
he finally left, after we spattered some loose change into his top hat (he was not impressed),
to wow the other punters with his charms.
Note to self: as soon as an English man discovers your Australian-inity, he WILL latch on like a mollusk.
fun times.
so, to really piss off lucy - some more drunken goodness.
(ps - lucy just looked over my shoulder and screamed,
"nooo! you're so mean. just 'cause you're GOING BALD!!")
it was good.
as far as these things go.
there was this one amazing climate-controlled room with flasks of fish.
it looked more amazing as a space than anything else.
Department of mysteries anyone?
Woah! This is a fish in a jar - fucking freaky shit, no? I kept hearing "Luuuucy, why did you let me diiiiie?" 
"I thought we were friiieeeeends" BAAAARGH!after that, we nicked off to the contemporary art show down the road.
(ps - 'nicked off'...? being in a foreign language culture really messes up your own natural lingo.)
(pps - see! 'lingo'?!)
lots and lots of art.
LOTS.
i'm gonna try and write a review about some of the stuff we saw and see if i can get it published.
if i can i'll post it up here.
so i won't ramble on about that now. (Cuz it was pretty boring - though to be fair, awesome fucking collection. But made less awesome by security guards following you into every corner - look dude, I ain't gonna steel a 10 metre Andy Warhol. I just wanted to have a LOOK. Gah.)
and then...
we saw a collection of short films about animals (twas an animal themed day apparently)
in a little place we almost couldn't find.
It was quite weird.
For the record, our fabulous hanky-map of Berlin did an epic not-so-fabulous-after-all fail. The gallery was NOT where the map said it was.
But we found it, with some super-bold doorbell ringing on my part.
where they practically apologised for charging us €1 for a beer.
What we thought would be an epically cool vibey film viewing ended up being Kent, myself and three very nervous Brits, being shut in a dark room of quiet viewing.
lucy learnt about seahorse males carrying the bebbies in a pouch,
and that video art, for the most part, bores her into a stupor.
Oh no, I already knew that. It wasn't even video art really. Donkeys pissing on the floor is NOT THAT INTERESTING. I don't give a shit how good your lens is. I just thought it would be a little more fun drinking beer and glancing and a little less sitting in a lecture theatre and not speaking. It was like being at school!
sometimes, it truly is gruelling.
and then we were off to drinks and magicians and 7ft german men at the bar (i stood next to this dude, and i didn't even reach his shoulder. i actually felt my ego shrivel. and yes - i said my ego...) and strange little german men fawning over our norwegian drinking partner and discussions about paper wrapped inside souvlakis in melbourne.
we finally acclimatised to the berlin hours and actually stayed up until 230am!
'twas a fun evening at a local bar called wohnzimmer with renee and stefano.
i kept getting the surly pregnant bar chick, who just glowered at me whenever i said anything in deutsch,
and lucy got the friendly (and sexy) spanish bar dude, who seemed well flirty.
quoteth my wife, 'i could so have picked up if i wanted'.
nice. (It's true - he was into me.)
and we had an old drunk english magician come and play tricks at our table
...and gyrate his creaky old hips in renee's face. (He was seriously into Renee, kept saying "tricks for the lay-deees!" while humping near her head.)
his tricks were ok
(they were quite good, except he kept doing maths related tricks,
which were lost on me, and then cracking up and saying "oh no I made a mistake ho ho ho!")
he finally left, after we spattered some loose change into his top hat (he was not impressed),
to wow the other punters with his charms.
Note to self: as soon as an English man discovers your Australian-inity, he WILL latch on like a mollusk.
fun times.
so, to really piss off lucy - some more drunken goodness.
(ps - lucy just looked over my shoulder and screamed,
"nooo! you're so mean. just 'cause you're GOING BALD!!")
It's true. He is. Photos to come. This means war.
just for that... one more!
just for that... one more!
Fuck! You gonna die Kent!
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